That is my belief.
There are plenty of times in my life where I've thrown my hands up at the sky and shouted why oh why. Why God would you let this happen to me? Why am I suffering so much? Are you up there lampooning at my pain? I know God doesn't do that. In fact, after the whole ordeal is over, I know why things happened the way they did. God answers my questions by assuring me that things happen for a reason; that reason is according to his plan.
The reason I do some things,
the reason I laugh,
the reason I cry,
the reason I feel a certain way,
the reason why I say the things I say,
why I think the things I think,
why I find myself in situations where I see no solution,
the reason for meeting certain people,
the reason the reason the reason -
the reason is, i'm suppose to.
I've also come to realize that through a few of my acts of sin, I've grown and learned from them. More reasons as to why I had to endure the consequence. I've acknowledged the fact that I can't control everything, that my heart and shoulders weren't made to handle every weight that I seem to place onto myself. My life was created for a reason, I'm here for a reason, I'm apart of other people's lives for a reason. I seek that reason because I want full understanding. I crave it, whether the answer be bitter or sweet, I want it. But I must wait for it. I won't know until it's over. I may find traces and clues along the way, but I cannot assess it until it's over.
Lately, my heart has been spewed all over the place, unable to decide for itself. What I feel, is it my heart speaking? Is it my heart that lures for it, desires it, and yearns for it? Is it only logical? Or is it illogical? Is it even real? Or is it all pretend? This test... this situation, what is it's purpose? I suppose in time I'll find out.
For now, I'm going go with what I feel is right, and so far I've been feeling good.
